In maneuvering a USS Dallas-class sub, over-rolling your craft is something to be avoided, lest you get yourself into an un-rightable position. When it comes to JBL subs, however, it's advisable to roll as much as possible, lest you get yourself into an un-rightable position via back-spasm. That's why the new JBL Sub Transporter is conveniently equipped with a solid caster board and rolling casters.

Made specifically for the JBL 18" sub, the the Sub Transporter snugly slips over the woofer enclosure and zips to fully enclose the cabinet, then -- here's the important part -- once the sub is loaded you quickly flip it over onto the large 4" integrated caster board and you're ready to roll. Literally! You are now ready to roll your sub! For its sneakers!

Of course, life is like mashed potatoes, and if you've ever tried to bicycle through a mound of freshly-mashed spuds (did you see me on that episode of Double Dare?), you know that at some point, you're going to have to carry a thing. For when you do need to manually increase your subwoofer's relative altitude, the JBL Sub Transporter features reinforced handles at easy lift-points (i.e., right near somebody else's hands).

The JBL Sub Transporter proudly bears the JBL logo, emblazoned via embroidery on the front. Unless you roll it backwards. Then you are disrespecting the JBL brand, and proper etiquette dictates that you must then burn the soiled JBL Transporter in a preordained disposal ceremony.