Winter NAMM 2007 is many things to many people. For some, it's the opportunity to make an impression in the music marketplace. Many small, struggling companies put their best foot forward at NAMM and hope for the best. Larger, well-established companies come to NAMM to show off the latest gee-whiz additions to the product line.

And then there are the people who come to NAMM to drink refreshing adult beverages and wax philosophical. And do they ever!

Before I launch into that particular tale of fermented-vegtable juice adventure, let's talk about the good stuff;

The two words I didn't expect to hear together have finally been used in a sentence. Eventide announced its brand new line of guitar stompboxes, showing off the brand new TimeFactor and ModFactor. Eventide Rep Dan Gillespie told me that his company has been tempted to enter the stompbox fray in the past, but the available technology wasn't up to the job, at least not according to what the company wanted to do, which is mainly putting the same sounds found in an Eventide rack mount into a stompbox.

Now, the company feels the technology has finall allowed them to do just that. Stay tuned for more details on the Eventide stompbox series.

I also managed to get a few questions in with a member of They Might Be Giants, who was demoing some Electro-Harmonix stompboxes. So what's an EH favorite of Dan Miller? He says for the They Might Be Giants bass sound, the Electro-Harmonix Little Big Muff is "Definitely the best distortion for the bass. It doesn't suck the low end, which basically everything else does."

What does Miller use? The EH HOG and the POG find their way into TMBG live shows quite often. When it comes to Electro-Harmonix new products, Miller showed off the new Stereo Pulsar, Stereo Polyphase, and Stereo Clone Theory.

Miller was friendly, fun to talk to, and willing to put up with about six hundred photographs. I got the hint that I was torturing him with the flash, but not before giving him permanent retinal damage. Don't worry, Dan, it won't affect your playing. Unless you're like Zappa and have to look at your fingers when you perform, in which case, you're screwed. Sorry 'bout that.

Winter NAMM isn't all fun and games, in spite of great interviews, cool gear, and lots of swag. In fact, if you aren't careful you can stumble right into the seedy side of the event, where well-intentioned early-afternoon pick-me-up drinks turn into horrible, slobbering binges. Imagine the horror as you watch respected industry professionals turn into weeping shadows of their former selves, babbling into your microphone like Colonel Kurtz in Apocalypse Now. "The horror, Joe! You can't imagine the horror of being a success in this beastly industry," one profoundly intoxicated gent confided, right into my microphone. Then, he mumbled a string of profanities and warned me to steer clear of the tar pits. "They'll eat you ALIVE!"

This was at 2PM, folks.

For the record, as this particular "interview" subject was profoundly inebrieated, it's entirely possible that I misheard the entire half-coherent rant. Perhaps he was really extolling the virtures of James Joyce, William Faulkner, and Proust. It could be that he was really explaining the more subtle aspects of Keynesian economics as they apply to a society dedicated to venture capitalism.

But what I HEARD sounded suspiciously like a bar-room confessional to all sorts of heinous crimes which are better left unmentioned, with a bit of air guitar thrown in for good measure.

But, ho ho! All this is in good fun, is it not? All is well as long as the asprin is handy. No bones were broken and the wonderful, loud, and generally fun-loving spectacle that is Winter NAMM 2007 rolls on. Keep watching this space, there is much more to come!