First it was the conspicuously-named Elixir Coated Strings (with "nano-web technology"). Now Ernie Ball has thrown down the eternal-string-life-gauntlet with their Coated Titanium Slinky Acoustic strings. Coated-Titanium sounds pretty impressive, but what's the reasoning behind it [other than an industry-wide obsession with longevity]?

According to Ernie Ball:

"Coated titanium Slinky Acoustic sets are stronger and longer-lasting than traditional coated and uncoated strings thanks in part to an exclusive protective coating on both the wrap wire and the plain strings as well as a patented winding of titanium wire around the lock twist of the ball end."

OK, that sounds fairly logical. Are you offering any other advance in technology that might remind me of Walt Disney or Ted Williams, perhaps?

"Enhancing the inherent string quality and freshness is Ernie Ball's new string packaging — the company's first new string packaging concept in more than 45 years . . . hermetically sealed into their packages at Ernie Ball's desert headquarters in Coachella, CA, the Slinky Acoustic strings are exposed to minimal moisture and humidity from factory to retailer —- ensuring that all strings are as fresh upon opening as they were the day they were made."

Actually, that kind of reminds me more of Wilford Brimley's character in Cocoon. The next logical step: strings coated with the LOST GOLD OF SOLOMON.